Dreaming, I Was Only Dreaming

I didn't see a single pitch from last night's deflating loss in Colorado, but was following the game on my phone during the time. The final result was crushing, and the defeat lingered in my mind for a good hour, despite the deafening music surrounding me. As I made my way home the feeling of panic set it, and finally reached a boiling point with the posting of the giant noose seen below. Then, I went to sleep.

Like someone turning on a bright light, it came to me in a dream. I was playing craps in Las Vegas, and was winning big. At one point I recall being up over $10,000, which is about $9,999 dollars more than I have ever made gambling. Drinks were flowing, chips were flying, whoops and hollers were echoing through the casino. Vision of the penthouse suite were dancing in my head.

Then suddenly a cold streak set in. I was putting on a clinic of how to lose at gambling. Further and further my winnings shrank. What was once the insurmountable Mt. Everest of casino chips had become nothing more than a mole hill. I panicked. Lower and lower my chip stack went until I was left with a small profit of $1,000. Discouraged, I left the table and stumbled back to my room, beating myself up the entire elevator ride back. How could I let such a large profit slip away? I slumped down in a chair in my hotel room, buried my head in my hands, and tried to convince myself that a profit was a profit, regardless of how big it once was.

When I awoke this morning the panic was gone. The loss to Colorado still stung, but the feeling of despair, the feeling of failure, had subsided. Perhaps a 9 game lead earlier in the season was too much, a bit too improbable for any team to maintain. The realization that my team is still in possession of first place, albeit by a slimming margin, is sustaining me for today. Should the Dodgers lose tonight, well then who knows? But at least for today I'm sustaining.